Friday, October 31, 2008


I have the very lucky fortune of having perfect teeth. I still have my wisdom teeth, no fillings, no sensitivity, never had braces, I've got one crooked wolf tooth which is apparently somewhat attractive.

The only problem I have with them is that they have a yellow tinge. Not super obvious, and they come out white in photos (reflection of the flash) but I've never really been happy with the colour.

I've tried whitening products twice; one worked quite well but wore off pretty quickly. The last one I got from my dentist, didn't even work.

So, in order to nip this in the bud once and for all, I went to one of those Laser Teeth Whitening places instead of a dentist.The process is pretty interesting; you make your appointment for the following week and they get you to brush your teeth with a tooth mousse for that week to help desensitise your teeth. They'd also make the plastic trays that are moulded to your teeth, but I already had some.

At the appointment, they put the stuff on your teeth and then stick a lazer pointed at your mouth for an hour and a half while you watch a movie.Sounds pleasant, but holey moley! It's a bit freaky having all this stuff in your mouth and almost impossible to swollow, and of course, because it's hard to swollow, suddenly you need to every 2 seconds. Apart from choking on my own saliva, after a while your teeth get super sensitive and your nerves seem to spasm or something. It's incredibly un-nerving and totally painful. There's nothing you can do about it.
They did go superwhite and looked great, but I honestly nearly cried on the way home, these shocks of sensitivity were amazing. I've done martial arts forever, and have quite a high pain threshold, but usually when something hurts you can do something about it. If you've busted your ankle, you rest it. If you walk on it, it's going to hurt. With this whole tooth thing, there was nothing I could do, everything would be fine, then suddenly a shock of nerve pain would hit. Biting down, moving your head, closing your mouth, opening your mouth, nothing would work.The rest of that day I was in massively weird pain, Nurafen Plus helped a bit, but it was still there.I had to put tooth mousse in my trays and wear that, that helped also.

I don't want to sound like a wuss, because I don't think I am, but it was probably the most surreal pain I've ever faced, and because it was completely self-induced and vanity related I felt foolish.I didn't tell anyone, including Cara, until the pain subsided. That was easy enough, I think it took Cara a couple of days to notice the brightness. In her defence, we were both pretty busy, we may have only hung out at bed-time.

They gave me a heap of the bleach and asked me to use it after a couple of days to secure the colour, but honestly, even a couple of weeks my teeth were really sensitive and I'd still get random jolts of tooth pain. Also, they were pretty bright already, I didn't want to blind people.
After about 3 weeks though, my teeth were back to their yellow tinge but still fairly sensitive.
I used the bleach on Thursday night for an hour and they went straight back to white, but the jolts of sensitivity came back also.I've been using the touth mousse and a sensiivity toothpaste pretty much the whole time.

Honestly, I think I regret the whole process and honestly wouldn't wish it on an enemy let alone recommend it to a friend.The yellow came back too quickly for the expense and the pain of the whole ordeal. I honestly wish I had photos to show y'all, but I never even thought about it until right this second.

Strangely, my teeth look totally white in some light, and totally yellow in other light, so I can't even be outraged and all IT DIDN'T WORK AT ALL RARRR!

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

What pushes my potato this week.

I don't want to sound easily annoyed, but biting my bottom this week are peeps that call you because they didn't listen to or read the instructions you already gave them.

It happens all the time, calling to find the time of a party, the address of a gig, we seriously has a friend who asks directions, then glazes over after the first bit, then calls when she's driven that first bit, calls again after the next bit and then calls from the front of the resturant, etc to see where you are. Freakin' kills me. I've learnt now; Step A. Say directions, Step B. Turn off phone, Step C. Turn off Cara phone, Step D. Wait a little longer, but she'll figure it out.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

What chucks my chicken this week.

Bugging me lately is the diet of the youth. Honestly, who munches chips and twisties all day long in an office, rrrrarrrrrr! So loud! So irritating! It's not even food.

P.S) Coke is not water.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

What grunts my gears this week.

I love stories, they are pretty much my favourite thing. What's been killing me lately are peeps who argue over the trivialities of a story or conversation. I don't care what the guy's actual middle name is, just tell me how he fell into that brothel.

My 'bahhhhh!' goes doubly so for dudes and chicks that argue over a inconsquential details of an example. Okay, okay, sure the computer goes 'dooo dooo' instead of the 'beep beep' I said, but could you maybe concentrate on the fact that it's on fire and levitating?

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

What spears my salmon this week.

I'm not much of a shopping person. I like all shopping expeditions to be carried out like a military operation. Storm in, extract the hostage, storm out. 35 seconds.

That said, I seem to collect so many coins, in the quest for transaction speedation I chuck the closest monetary note at the shop person instead of counting out coins I've saved. I then toss all my coins into a bag and take that bag to the bank just before it's too heavy to lift.

So, what's spearing my salmon these days are shops that charge that extra 20 cents for an item. Why must anything be $10.20 or $5.10? Clearly the shops are trying to scab that extra bit of moola, but surely the administration of such coinage isn't worth their while.

Even though I don't like the coin, I totally hand over $20 for a $10.20 item to make them coin up, in the hope that these places learn to charge a normal price freakin'.

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

My curtins are fading...

Awesome, for the next 3 weeks, my phone is going to ignore the fact that it's day light savings. Usually it's awesome when everything flicks over automatically, but since we've decided to hit +1 hour early without consulting all our devices, it's going to be problematic. I put my phone clock a hour forward, it's good for a few hours then flicks it back. Good times, good times.

Sunday, October 05, 2008

Hi everyone, I'm like back or similar.

As an enjoyable read for everyone, here are the reasons I've been a nonblog.

  • Prior to May 30th 2008, I was too filled with Hate of Everything to inflict my acursed thoughts onto any other person, including the fictional characters that roam the internet.
  • Between June 01 and Sept 30, I was too filled with 'la la la I don't have to anywhere near a computer because I am an unemployed bum hey I wonder what is happening on facebook'.

While in the past I may have promised things like 'hey I'm back or similar' in the past, this time I could actually be back or similar because I am once again a dude of employment who may need to look busy at times and writing in this here start programs applications notepad to be posted on the internetz later is a good way to seem busy but without having to use workbrain.

I'm sure you'll be quite unpleased to know that within two days of being a Dude of Work the RSI is totally back after 4 months of some mighty fine hand restage. While this does blow somewhat, I am looking forward to having some gnarly claws within a year or two. I intend to use said claws for scaring children and being mocked by teens.You're just not cool unless you're being mocked by teens.

Since I don't imagine anyone would check this here blogage after so long of mistreatment, the first person to read this might be doing so many years after it was actually published, in which case, I bid you a lovely 2024. Also, watch out! There is a massive monster* behind you.

* Or similar.