What does come after Earth?

Hello, is this Mars from http://dotandmars.blogspot.com/?
How are you today?

Hello, this is Mars from http://dotandmars.blogspot.com/, you may remember me from such episodes as:
Flag as cape wearing equals 'national pride'
The Mars Medical Journals
The 'things I didn't do today' list
Viva Italia!: The day I won $90 in an office sweep
That time I fell off the chair
American vs UK version of The Office
AND
The on-going search for my first husband

Incidentally, I am fine today!


Thanks for your intervieweeness, are you aware that you are the entire Internet's newest favouritest blogchick?

The ENTIRE internet? Yikes! Nooo... I'm just a blog-stalker come good...


Now, it seems to your newer readers that young Dot just isn't pulling her own weight post-wise? Do you think she started travelling around Australia just to get out of writing? Pffft, like the desert doesn't have broadband.

Well, that is an interesting theory. One that hadn't occurred to me, actually. Dot has been a bit slack, but she's home now, so I'm sure things will pick up for her. Before she left, she was having some computer malfunctions (where the machine, quite seriously, blew up), which was possibly some-what of a hindrance for her. I have the utmost faith that you will be hearing plenty from Dot in the not too distant future. (Which will be a great for everyone involved really, as it might encourage me to shut the hell up/develop an insecurity about my blog-post "quality")


When are you getting married to an American/Somoan? Will we, the Internet get an invite to the celebration?

No plans (as yet) to get married to an American/Samoan/American Samoan.

ALTHOUGH, I don't rule this out as an option (not that I'm telling anyone else that). I am almost certainly leaving for America in approximately 42 days, plans for the Samoan adventure are somewhat less than almost certain as they, in fact, do not exist at all (as yet).
HOWEVER, in this modern era of continent hopping, I don't suppose it's essential at all to travel to Samoa to find a potential Samoan husband.

So stay tuned.

The Internet can come to my wedding, if it wants. Given the current situation, I am far more likely to spontaneously combust than to get married in this life-time though, so the internet shouldn't hold its breath, as the whole situation is, sadly, moot.


Do you instead have your heart set on a heavy balding man you meet at the pub?

I absolutely do not.


As far as I can tell/scroll you never did state clearly whether you decided to be gay or not, and then there was no follow up story of you pashing a chick anyway just to make your blog interesting. Did you forget to post about that?

I did forget to post about my lesbian romp, actually. It was a glorious romp, with titties and sensible shoes a-boom-boom. However, after my extensive experimentation, the curiosity I once held is now safely out of my system. I was really an each way bet there for a while... but
then John Howard told me I was WRONG to make out with other ladies. I thought to myself..."Ohh...Wrong." So I stopped, and have since decided that the hetro way of life is the one for me. Have now dedicated my (miserable) existence to finding my first husband.


Will there be trouble if you like your as yet unspecified 3rd housemate better than Dot? Unrelated, if an offer arose, would you sell Dot for $250 to a nice family in the suburbs?

I'm sure there will be trouble if our little Emo turns out to be more agreeable than Dot. There may be a mutiny in the house and WHO KNOWS what might happen.

I haven't ever mentioned this before, but I actually bought Dot, years ago, from a nice family in the suburbs for $200. The price was steep, but I thought she was worth it (at the time). After all the effort I've put in to training her over the years, the asking price would have to be pretty generous for me to consider trading her in.


This is the first blog where I've seen a four year gap between postings. How did you ever remember the password?

The four year gap in posting is the bain of my (blogger) existence. The day Dot realised that those date buttons were there (after a bottle of Safeway's cheapest red) was the WORST DAY OF MY LIFE. But you know, a deal is a deal, and when we started this blog, we said to one another that we wouldn't edit each others posts. So what can I do?


Was your blog merely designed to be just another playground for Steph and Jobe to match wits and hilariously crude banter or do you have designs of your own? Is it true that your plan to concrete all of blogland is going well?

Steph and Jobe don’t hang around much... and if they did, well I suppose I’d shoo them off with a broom or something. The concreting is going fine... I guess..?


Have you hunted down your hairdresser? Was that mystery ever solved?

Alas, I haven’t found a new hairdresser. There wasn’t really a mystery (was there?)... my girl went off to England and left me behind. Haven’t needed to go back to the hairdresser since last time, so not feeling the full extent of the situation just yet.


What's your story, are you a chocolate or a planet?

A bit of both, I suppose. Some days I'm smooth and creamy (though rarely rich..), and others I'm ready to explode from the inside. Some may even say, implode.


Thanks for your time, Mars, you were very excellent/okayish.

No problem Ads-man! Okayish is a way of life for me, so I’ll take it..
BTW, please feel free to edit this interview to make me look better, smarter, more attractive etc.