HB to me.
Today is my 31st birthday.
While I think I can be quite the attention seeking laughwhore, I'm always a bit shy around attention that has been thrown upon me rather than me going out and grabbing attention with ridiculously humourous and impeccibly timed qwips.
The walk along the corridor to my department filled me with supershy, knowing that my workmates were going to make a fuss as soon as they saw me.
I have, however, survived, unscathed and had some cake to boot. Getting older rocks.
One thing that doesn't rock, is getting older (confusing no?). I would say my greatest fear in life, is not public speaking or dying, but getting old. Not old like 35, 40 or 57, but old old. Old where you start to become quite unaware of what's going on around you, where you are deafer, blinder, non working of knees, where you're frustrated with the failings of your own body and start getting grumpy/crotchety but secretly know that any of those youths could break any of your feeble bones just by swinging their iPod at your hip. Damn youths.
Obviously I've got quite some years before all this happens in earnest, but for me, 31 signifies the start of the unstoppable slide. Already, my fast twitch reflexes are slower than a dude half my age. Also, I can describe people, virtual adults even, as half my age. Already, my energy droops and I can make old person noises when I get out of a comfy chair, also some chairs are now becoming comfy.
So, my point to this post is that I'm having a slight freakout. Not because I haven't achieved particular things to tick on the list, but because my dream of becoming a hardcore vigilante dealing death and/or embarrassment to drug dealers is picking up momentum to speed out of my grasp.
My one saving grace of thoughts is that I'm still the youngest and most hopeless dude in my Kung Fu class. Everyone else is better, faster, fitter, older. I wish I was all those things. There might be hope for me yet. Watch out doers of evils!